SORSN: During one of our trips through the internet, the staff of SORSN found a message board post on a high school sports site that suggest you “can’t take a hit.” Did you see the post and would you like to respond?
Ray: That is true. I don’t like to get hit. Sometimes I just fall down on purpose to avoid being tackled. It’s soo much easier.
SORSN: What up with the new hairdo? Was it cut to gain more of an aerodynamic advantage?
Ray: It’s really just for the ladies. Now that I have short hair they can see my pretty brown eyes.
SORSN: Friday’s loss against Rockwood had to be frustrating for you and the whole team. Is Oakdale going to be on the receiving end of all that bottled up frustration and anger?
Ray: That is positively correct Shawny Shawn. We intend to do the same thing that we did to them last year.
SORSN: Did you do anything different this week preparing for Oakdale than you did last week preparing for Rockwood?
Ray: Not Really. We just know that a former Greenwave player is coaching for them now and we really want to spank the eagles to remind him where he’s from. But it’s all in good fun.
SORSN: It’s been rumored that the Green Wave locker room is in need of a new radio? What happened to the previous one?
Ray: Well, what actually happened was, Coach Mo was drinking one of his pineapple margaritas in the field house like he always does on Wednesday, when T-Stock took off his shirt, and Coach saw this and got a little spooked and spilled his manly drink on our sound system. Now we all have to bring in walkmans if we want listen to our Kenny Chesney Albums